This could have been a Watchmen-length graphic novel. Plenty of material for it. But I decided not to. Hence, this montage-style highlight reel.

Fetus Christ is trying to salvage as much of his plans as possible. That includes the Sermon on the Mount (which actually talked about the meek, and not so much about the unborn), socializing with prostitutes and children (and other socially inappropriate things), the famous walking on water stunt, and the ever-popular miracle from the wedding at Cana: turning water into wine.